Thinking...

Apparently if you think you're going mad you aren't... So doesn't that imply if you think you're sane that you're mad? Life is a complicated thing but it can be snatched out from underneath you... In an instant! Why should you hold you're tongue? Why shouldn't you? My brain has now been twisted and manipulated so many times that I like being used.... Hurt and heartbroken. This isn't normal is it? Why do I think of the perfect way to murder someone? However I make sure that it's with the most agony... Is it because I am not letting go of hatred and  the pain I keep inside? I feel like an empty vessel, meaningless, emotionless, worthless... Hopeless! Why don't people just give up on me?